OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Randomize
