Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
