So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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