we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
It's Friday. Sex?
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
