I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
