yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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