Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
my shit smells like andre
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
So much Jack, so little girl.
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