I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
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