these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
if i died would you start the facebook group?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Randomize
