Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Like sorry your dick wonβt suck itself?
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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