hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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