i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
i drank out of a bidet.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
