Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Sext me about skeletons
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Randomize