Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
