Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
