white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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