she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
