We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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