i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
