I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i just wanna soil my oats bro
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
