I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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