i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Randomize