I'm drive I can fine osifer
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
