Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
