The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I wear drunk well.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize