In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
