i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
