Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Randomize
