You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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