I want to stick my p in your. b.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
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