don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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