I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
