well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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