she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
