i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
