when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
