he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Randomize
