Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
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