the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
