You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize