I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
