they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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