no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
Randomize
