break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
