i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
