Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
