I'm gonna have a badass scar
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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