Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize