i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
