; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
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