just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize