Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
