Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Enjoy the penises
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Randomize
